Happy 4 months!

It just keeps getting better everyday! Zachary continues to amaze us with new developmental milestones and the cutest personality!

We just returned from a trip to Idaho to visit my parents. What an awesome time! I was nervous about the airplane travel, but it proved to be a lot easier than I expected. Zachary was a champ, and we made it there and back with zero hiccups. I'm going back in January (without M!), so fingers crossed it goes just as smoothly.

Zachary is such a flirt! He gives the biggest, cutest smiles to the ladies! He is now laughing out loud and still continues to "talk" to us and the handsome baby in the mirror. He has pretty long conversations with that cute baby!

His neck strength is better everyday. My brother just bought us a jumperoo for Christmas, and Zach loves it! He is mesmerized by the lights, sounds, and movement! He also loves when we let him "stand," where we're holding him and he bears weight on his legs. He laughs every time we do this!

Zachary is wearing 3-6 month clothes and size two diapers. He weighed in today at 14 lbs. 4 oz. This puts him in the 38th percentile for weight. I'm curious about his length! His 4-month appointment isn't until January 3, so I'll have to wait. Just looking at him, I can tell he's long!

He is now sleeping 6 hours at a time. This means we are waking only once during the night...! We seriously cannot believe that we are getting more sleep - finally! What a blessing (and no, I'm not so naive to think that it will be like this forever...I do know how quickly he can revert back to waking more frequently, especially with teething in the near future).

We gave him a few little tastes of avocado the other night while we were sitting around the dinner table. He seemed to like them, although lately he likes anything we put in his mouth. He especially likes chewing on our fingers. He has discovered how to grasp certain items and bring them to his mouth to suck/chew, so I'm on the lookout for good soft teething toys.

We are so looking forward to our first Christmas with Zachie! I hope all of you have a wonderful Christmas and very happy, hopeful New Year!

Today is special.

On December 10, 2009 I had my third IUI. That night, I ovulated. 8 months and 11 days later, my dreams, hopes, wishes and prayers were answered.

It's hard to believe he's been with us for a year.

Today I am celebrating with my little Elfie:

3 months!

Mommyhood has me quite busy in the past month! I've turned into such a bad blogger, but have very good reason. My little man is growing and changing so much, and we're having a blast with all the new "firsts"!

Recently, Zachary:

Sticks both fists in his mouth and chews. He does this frequently throughout the day, and it's hilarious to watch. He hasn't shown a preference for right or left yet, but he has managed to isolate his thumb on both hands and suck. Adorable!

Still wakes up twice at night to eat. Both of us have adapted to this schedule and don't feel sleep-deprived anymore!

Laughs out loud! His smiles and giggles are infectious and he LOVES to talk to the handsome baby in the mirror. His coos and squeals crack us up!

Has a much longer attention span and sleeps less frequently through the day. This has me constantly looking for ways to entertain and stimulate him.

Can hold his head up! His neck strength is amazing..he loves to turn his head and look around the room at people and things.

Weighs 13 pounds. What a chunk!

Definitely recognizes and prefers mommy and daddy when he's tired or fussy.

Sits in his space-saver high chair with us when we eat dinner. We love this family time together.

Has been making a lot of new friends in my Baby Bootcamp class. He loves to watch me work up a sweat!

Has pretty bad cradle cap, which I treat with baby oil but it always manages to return. Uggh! He also has some eczema. We are treating that and it doesn't seem to be getting worse.

Is making us happier and happier every day!

Happy Halloween!!

Our little Chile Pepper slept through all the trick-or-treaters, but not before his mommy snapped some cute shots!

My Bony Boys

A friend of mine gave Zachary an adorable sleeper set from O.ld N.avy. So...I couldn't resist a photo op with our other "baby" Charlie:

2 Months!

They all tell you ahead of time that it goes by so fast and before you know it, they're leaving for college. Well, okay, so we're not there yet, but what they've said has held true for the first two months!

Recently, Zachary:

Has been sucking on his fist non-stop! I think he might be trying to isolate his thumb, but even if he isn't, it's pretty darn cute!

Stares at us and his toys, which then prompts some darn great smiles. We LOVE seeing this! His favorite spot now is on his play mat. He coos and "talks" to his animal friends hanging above.

Still wakes up twice during the night to eat, but his first stretch of sleep has increased to 4.5 hours. This is heaven for me...and I never thought I'd find myself saying that 3.5 hours of sleep is "heaven'!!

Went a record 5 days without pooping. Yes, I had a mild freak-out, but the doctor and everyone else said that this is pretty common in breastfed babies. What I want to know is why none of the books mention it and Dr. Google is mum about something so common? Oh well. He pooped yesterday and I am STILL doing my happy dance! I've never before been so happy to change a dirty diaper.

Has a bit of baby eczema which we are treating with special lotion. Another "common" thing that nobody mentions. Huh.

Loves looking at lights. He is fascinated by the lights in the house and with all screens (TV, Computer, phone).

Is awake A LOT more than he was a month ago! This means I am constantly looking for ways to entertain and stimulate him. I absolutely love the times when he's awake, alert, and wanting to interact with me. It's unreal.

Still sleeps in the bassinet next to our bed. We figure he won't be moving out until he sleeps consistently through the night. It's just so convenient to reach over for him at 2 am and feed him in bed.

Is now up two pounds from his birth weight. We will find out his length next week at the doctor's, but I suspect he has grown quite a bit. He's long!

Is wearing all 0-3 month clothes except for 3-6 months in the O.ld Na.vy brand (they run small!).

Loves being carried in the Baby Bjorn, and almost always falls asleep when placed in it. It's our go-to nap device when he just can't settle himself enough to fall asleep. I also love carrying him in it when we're out. It's so much easier than the cumbersome carseat/stroller combination.

Went on his first overnight road trip, which was a wild success! He visited some baby friends and has made a few new baby friends. He also attended his first Gym.boree class this week. He's a very busy baby.

Continues to be our special, happy little miracle!

The Ve.ry Hun.gry Caterp.illar

Warning: Some of you may find this to be TMI...but I'd like to share my experience in the hopes of educating and informing those who are planning to bf their kiddos. Of course, I realize everyone is different, but I think information is power! If you don't like words like "breast" or "nipple", your reading should stop here!

Okay. So here goes.

I did as much as humanly possible to prepare myself for breastfeeding. I read two books on the subject, interviewed all my mommy friends who bf'ed, and took the class offered by my hospital. M and I had many conversations about what kind of sacrifice it would be, but really it was never a question or a decision for us. As far back as I can remember, I knew I would breastfeed my children.

Many of my friends had success nursing their babes using nipple shields. I was, of course, intrigued by this because a few had told me they helped reduce the pain (i.e. cracked/blistered/bleeding nipples) associated with the first few weeks with the baby. Also, one of the books I read indicated, by way of diagrams and pictures, that I might be a good candidate for nipple shields due to the size and shape of my nipples. So I bought a nipple shield prior to giving birth. I tossed it in the diaper bag without even opening it, thinking I'd have it just in case.

As luck would have it, I delivered Zachary on a Saturday morning. At my out-of-date hospital, there aren't any lactation consultants staffed on weekends. Oh joy. So once the nurses brought me my little bundle my first request was to feed him. The post-partum nurse I had that day took one look at my nipples and said (in a less-than-enthusiastic voice), "Oooh." At first I was confused, but soon realized she was referring to my nipples. I suggested to her that I had a shield in my bag. She perked up and had me get it out. So here I am, thinking, "Problem solved!" Unfortunately, I DID have the cracked, bleeding nipples in the first two weeks anyway. Go figure. But my little Zachary sucked on that shield like a champ for 5 weeks and 5 days.

Until I started listening to my gut. Call it mother's intuition.

You see, my first clue was at his one-month pediatrician appointment. Z gained 13 ounces in 21 days (at one week he weighed 8 lbs 15 oz and exactly three weeks later he was a mere 9lbs 12 oz). When I saw the number on the scale, my heart sank and I almost started crying! Everything I'd read told me that on average babies gain an ounce a day. So of course, Zachary was waaaay behind. The wait between the scale and the doctor that day was excruciating! Thankfully, I had my mom with me to help me rationalize and calm down. When the doc came in, he stated that he was happy with Zachary's weight. When he saw the look of concern on my face, he showed me a graph demonstrating that Z had gained a pound and 6 ounces from his hospital weight in that month. Turns out, the doc was looking at the bigger picture. So I went with it.

My second clue was a daily struggle to feed the poor baby to his satisfaction. Every time I fed him he was STILL HUNGRY after finishing, and he wanted to nurse every 1.5-2 hours throughout the day. In addition, he was still waking up every 2-3 hours at night. I was literally a cow. Moo. All I did, all day long, was feed the baby. And he was STILL HUNGRY (and it wasn't cute like the Hungry Caterpillar either!).

Thirdly, I had two instances of blocked milk ducts. This, if you haven't experienced it, is extremely painful, and each time I went without sleep as I tried everything under the sun to clear them out. So...

I started googling, and read a few things that said that nipple shields can decrease your milk supply..or, rather, cause you to not stimulate enough supply. This, of course, being because the baby is sucking on the nipple and not the breast, which is what stimulates more milk. In addition, if the baby isn't able to drain the breasts in each feeding, the ducts become clogged, thus increasing the risk of mastitis. I started getting worried. I was convinced I needed to ditch the shields, but was scared as hell to do it on my own, and I didn't even know how to get a proper latch (as I was never shown how to do it!)...

...so I decided to take matters into my own hands.

I called a lactation consultant who runs her own business here in town. She had been recommended to me by a few moms I met at a new mom support group I attended at my hospital. This, as it turns out, is the best decision I HAVE EVER MADE.

I went in for my first consult on Wednesday, September 29. This was exactly a week after Z's one month appointment. The first thing she did was weigh him....and he showed up at 10 pounds. This was only up 4 ounces in 7 days! AAACK!! After a brief discussion about the shields, how I came to use them, etc., she looked at my nipples and told me there is no reason I should have to use a shield. She took ahold of Z, put him to my breast, and he latched on like a pro. And it didn't hurt! She told me that we needed to do some catch-up - and it would take some work on my part - but that it was possible for us both to learn this new way of feeding.

I thought I had died and gone to heaven.

The lactation consultant's recommendation to me (in order to get my supply to where it needs to be) was to rent a hospital-grade electric double breast pump. I was to pump 7 times a day after feeding Z without the shield. This would ensure my breasts were emptied each time and encourage more milk to be made. I was to feed everything I pumped back to Z within 24 hours...so I was basically feeding him at the breast, then pumping, then bottle-feeding him what was left (to "top him off"). What an ingenious plan!

Since then, Zachary has been steadily gaining an ounce a day. As of Tuesday, he weighed 10 lbs 13 oz. Now that my supply is increased and I am nursing without the shield, I am weaning myself from the pump (5 times a day and then 3 times a day, until I can be done with it for good!).

The best advice I can give is to listen to your gut. I can't stress enough to new moms that if you are nursing and things just don't seem right, don't ignore your intuition. The best thing I did was to call that consultant. What I left out of this story is the emotional turmoil I went through to get to where I am today. I had a many break-downs and MANY sleepless nights. The worst feeling in the world is not being able to feed your baby properly and not knowing how to fix it. I can't tell you how many times I wanted to drive to WalMart at 2 am to buy some formula and be done with it. This experience has given me a deeper understanding of how and why so many women quit. I think many of our hospitals are doing us a disservice by not training their nurses to teach new moms how to feed their babies!

It really doesn't matter how much preparation you do, it's tenacity and determination that will give you the best shot at establishing and keeping a good breastfeeding relationship with your baby.

Sorry this is so damn long!!!!

A year ago..

It's my 31st birthday today! 30 was a pretty great year (infinitely better than 28 and 29), and I have a sneaking suspicion 31 will be even better!

I had a wonderful, relaxing day with Z after a busy weekend of travel. We started out with our breastfeeding support group this morning and spent the afternoon relaxing around the house. M took us both out to dinner tonight, capping off a beautiful, wonderful day! It made me think about this time last year and this post. Last year I seemed to be in a pretty good place mentally, as I sat on the couch and made love to my neti pot. Little did I know then that this is where I'd be today. Kinda makes you not wanna give up on your hopes and prayers, eh?

I am working on a detailed post about my recent adventures in breastfeeding. I've been mum about many of my struggles, and am ready to come clean! But for now, I'm going to put my little guy to bed and enjoy the last few hours of my special day..

Oh yes, and a pic from the Stanford/USC game we went to on Saturday (Go Cardinal!):

CAN't wait.

It's funny how often throughout my life I've found myself saying "I can't wait until.."

.."I finish school!!"
.."I find the right guy."
.."I have a great job."
.."I'm married."
.."We can buy a house."
.."I'm pregnant."
.."I have this baby!"

I am now finding myself saying things like, "I can't wait until he smiles...or says 'Mama'....or walks....or can enjoy reading books with me."

But the truth of the matter is that I CAN wait. For the first time, I feel like I really want time to slow down! The first 5 weeks of Zachary's life have literally flown by, and I already want that time back. I want to look back on this time and be able to say I cherished every minute and every milestone! I want to revel in everything new in this little creature's life, and I don't want to be spending my time looking forward to what's coming next. I want to live in the moment that is now...because I know all those fun things will happen in time, but he'll never be this small again!

There's a really great song by Lone.star called Let Them Be Little, which I highly recommend listening to if you get a chance.

Zachary's one month appointment was last Wednesday. He weighed in at 9 lbs. 12 oz., which is up a pound and a half from the weight he was a few days after his birth. Doc says he's pleased with the growth. His large head is measuring in the 85th percentile and he has grown an inch and a half.

Breastfeeding is going well, but I gotta admit that it is hard work. We were forewarned that it is a huge commitment, but no word of advice truly prepared me for what I'd be giving up. It's a lot more sacrifice than pregnancy, in my opinion. Just sayin'.

4 weeks

At 4 weeks, Zachary:

Eats a lot! He is/has gone through a growth spurt, which sometimes means he's feeding every 1.5-2 hours throughout the day. While exhausting for me, I love that he's getting what he needs and letting me know when he needs more. I'm so glad to be able to provide it!

Has officially outgrown his newborn clothes. He fits pretty nicely into the 0-3m, but some are still a tad big. My little boy is growing up so fast!

In general, has two wakeful periods during the day. First thing in the morning after his first feeding, he loves to just hang out with me and look around. Again in the evening around dinner time, his eyes are wide open and he's just taking it all in.

Has given us a few nights with 4.5 hours between feedings. What a WONDERFUL thing this is!!!! M loves that when he is hungry, he will try to get his milk from anyone who is holding him...this means M's neck, chin, shoulder, etc. It's pretty darn cute!

Is still just doing the involuntary smiles, but they have definitely gotten more frequent. We are eagerly anticipating the real deal!

Loves to be carried in the Moby Wrap and Baby Bjorn.

Is still wearing newborn sized diapers...but as soon as we run out of what we have, we are moving up to size 1.

Doesn't cry in the bathtub. He LOVES the warm water. This amazes me, and I love this sweet, bonding time with him.

Screams when he's hungry, but doesn't make a peep for any other reason. Actually, that's not true. He grunts when he has gas...and let me tell you, they are man-sized toots. He IS is father's son!

Has a blocked tear duct in his right eye. We clean it out frequently and are just waiting for it to resolve itself. Apparently this is quite common amongst newborns.

Loves to be bounced and rocked..and is mesmerized by any and all types of lights.

Is sooo strong and frequently jailbreaks his swaddles. He loves to have his hands near his face when he sleeps and eats.

Loves his carseat and going for rides in the car. We are grateful for this!

Is now sleeping in the bassinet next to the bed. Mommy misses him, and Daddy was glad to see him move out. He seems so far away now!!

Still likes to pee on us while we're changing his diaper. We are getting better about blocking it with a cloth diaper or a pee-pee teepee, but there are days that he goes through 3 outfits as a result of our inattention! Ah, the joys of baby boys!

Is absolutely the joy of our lives. We can hardly believe it's already been 4 weeks, and we are so smitten with this tiny little being. He is the miracle we waited for, and he was worth every minute of pain and disappointment.

Career Aspirations

Okay, so this confirms that we do, in fact, have the world's cutest baby. Anyone familiar with the movie Zoo.lander?? Well, apparently my little Zachary has seen it and is an aspiring male model. Here is his best "Blue Steel" pose:

The King in His Castle...and other Highlights

I truly can't believe it's been two weeks! M and I are soaking in every minute with our little one, and this bonding time has been invaluable to our little family! We feel so blessed with this mellow, sweet, adorable baby boy.

Here are some highlights from the first few weeks:

Sleeping:

While I swore I'd never be the type to have my baby sleep in bed with us, having a c-section caused me to be much more flexible in my ideas. Our plan had been for Zachary to sleep in the bassinet right next to the bed, but I quickly discovered that I couldn't sit up in bed without help, much less reach over the side of the bed to pick up a hungry baby. We had already invested in a S.nuggle Ne.st, thinking it would be a great device for Z to nap in downstairs on the couch:

Well, as it turns out, we are loving having Zachary sleeping in between us at night. This device also has a night light and plays the sounds of a uterus (!!!), which our little man loves! It makes tending to his needs (while I am still healing from the surgery) so much easier...and I truly enjoy being so close to him at night...another feeling I was not expecting to have! It's amazing how strong the bond is right away! The first 9-10 days were extremely sleep-deprived (oh boy, that's another post!)...but we are into a nice routine now and have found our rhythm in terms of sleep.

Eating:

Zachary is a champion breast-feeder. We never had any latch problems..the only thing that was frustrating at first was that it took my milk forever and a day to fully come in. I know that this is more common with a c-section (and hours upon hours of pitocin-induced labor), so I was trying to just go with the flow (or lack thereof, haha) and not get too worked up about it. I was also listening to all my friends say, "Oh you'll KNOW when it comes in!" This was throwing me for a loop because as it turns out, mine just came very gradually and I've never had an oversupply problem. Anyway, it's here and Z is definitely getting enough. At his 1.5 week pediatrician appointment, he had gained 11 ounces in 7 days!! We had been to the doctor when he was 4 days old because after birth he dropped almost an entire pound, and was slightly jaundiced. My milk coming in definitely fixed our problem!! I use a Bop.py Pillow and a Nipple Shield (and the Lan.sinoh nipple cream), and am loving the bonding time with my little man.

Other Fun Stuff:

Our Black Labrador Charlie has been an excellent big brother so far! Of course, I had some apprehension about the dog-baby relationship, but have found that our dog is a gentle giant! He only approaches the baby when he's invited, and is gentle with his kisses!

Zachary is much more alert in the past few days. He has more wakeful periods where he'll just look around or stare at us. He makes the cutest faces - one of which I'm going to do in a separate post. We love seeing his eyes open more as he starts to discover his world!

He is still wearing newborn-sized clothes, but he's so long (gonna be tall like his daddy - who is 6'3") I can see that he'll be moving to the 0-3m very soon. I already feel like he's growing too fast, which makes me want to spend every minute with him. We've already taken upwards of 300 pictures, as I'm so afraid we'll miss something great!

Knock on wood, but my little man is sooo mellow. He can sleep anywhere, anytime, and in pretty much any position! He slept almost all the way through a bath the other day! I'm not so naive to think that it'll be like this forever, but I'm enjoying it nonetheless. It has made our first two weeks together so much more manageable!

M and I (and various family members) found out very quickly that little boys LOVE to pee as soon as their diapers are removed. This has made for some HILARIOUS moments, and my poor mother has been the unluckiest recipient - all over her face and shirt - of the wee wee!

And (Finally!) some nursery pictures - with the king to make them official!

My New Joy.

Life Changing

Life with a newborn: I started this post 3 days ago!!

There are so many things on my mind since Zachary's birth, but the words to express my feelings are hard to come by. This baby boy has changed our lives in so many ways; but most importantly, I feel that M and I have discovered the meaning of true, unconditional love.

The labor and birth of this little miracle was much like our attempts at ttc: long, painful, and not at all what I would have planned for myself. However, the perfect creation that resulted from my efforts has been more than worth what we went through.

It started last Friday (the 20th) at 5:15 as I was awakening from a nap. I felt a low kick from the baby and then a popping sensation followed by GUSHING water. When I say gushing, it's no joke and it just keeps coming. The problem was that I was in bed and needed to get to the bathroom without soaking our carpet!! Quite the challenge. With heart racing, I called M (he was in his home office working that day!). His first response was to start cleaning up the water I had gushed all over the room! I hurriedly gathered the last few items to put in the bag (and also snuck a shower in), and M got everything else ready to go. Within 45 minutes we were on our way to the hospital!

My contractions picked up very quickly once we were settled in to our room. Because my water had broken and my first cervical check revealed I was only 2 cm dilated, they put me on a low dose of pitocin. Within 2 hours I had progressed to 6 cm and was READY for my epidural! And let me say, what a sweet relief that was. I loved every second of it!

The rest of my labor was slower..it took me until 4 am to reach a full 10 cm., at which point I was ready to start pushing. Pushing turned out to be so much different (and harder) than I thought it would be. Mostly because of the epidural, as I couldn't feel a thing! The nurses and M were awesome and were telling me that I was doing an awesome job, but it was so hard for me to tell, and each push drained so much energy from me....keep in mind we'd already been up all night long!

After an hour of pushing my OB came and checked my progress. He told me that baby was having a hard time descending further, despite the great pushing I was doing. He also noted that the baby had a swollen head as a result of being squished against my pubic bone. He wanted me to keep on truckin', so I did. For TWO MORE HOURS. Turns out the little guy's head and shoulders were just too wide to make it through my narrow frame. A.K.A. pubic bone.

When they told me that the recommendation was c-section, I was very sad...BUT I was also extremely exhausted, so I knew that it truly was my only option. M suited up in his haz-mat suit (!!), and by 7:45 they were wheeling me into the O.R.

I think I slept through most of the actual surgery. I remember feeling tugging and hearing voices all around me, but not much else UNTIL I heard the sweetest sound: Zachary's beautiful cries. My heart leapt and then the sobs came in abundance. I couldn't believe I was hearing my baby's perfect cries, and just lost it right there on the table. M was over with Zach while they cleaned him up and he got to trim the umbilical cord. Shortly after, they brought him to me so I could kiss his sweet cheeks, and then they were gone (they take the c-section babies to the nursery to get weighed, measured, etc.).

The hour I spent in recovery was quite frankly the hardest and longest of my lifetime. Time literally stood still, and all I can remember is an intense feeling of sadness and helplessness as I begged the nurse to see my baby and my body shook uncontrollably with chills. At some point, M came back, and the pediatrician followed closely behind. She reported a clean bill of health, and of course all I could say was, "When can I see him?" Over and over and over again. At some point, someone told me they were going to keep him in the nursery for a few hours before I could see him. This is the point where I FREAKED out. As they were wheeling me to our postpartum room, I could see my family at the end of the hall looking into the nursery and taking pictures. I felt so absolutely helpless, and demanded that he be brought to me. I can't remember how much time passed (and truly, why I even had to wait at all), but he was finally brought to me, and the celebrations commenced.

We spent 4 days in the hospital - enough time for me to start to heal and become more mobile. It was nice to have the help of the nurses for those first days as we got to know our son, but we were READY to get home on Tuesday!!! Since then, life has been more amazing than words can express. Zachary is an expert breastfeeder, and while it's been a slight challenge due to my milk taking it's sweet time coming in, we are coping well..and I am healing quicker than I expected!

Okay..this is a loong post..more to come soon (I hope!).

Is this real??

He's here!

Zachary entered this beautiful world this morning at 8:05 a.m. after a 15 hour labor and a cesarean delivery. I will post more later, but for now enjoy some pics of my 9lb. 3 oz. beautiful baby boy! He's simply perfect.

It's Happening!

38w2d

My water broke at 5:15 this evening! We are at the hospital now. I am contracting, but the last time they checked I was just 2 cm dilated, so they started me on a low dose of pitocin to speed things along.

Elfie will be in our arms soon!!

38 and The Plug

38 weeks!

I am two weeks away from my due date, and last night I lost my plug. Well, at least part of it (not sure how big the entire thing is - sorry about TMI!). I was so excited because it means my cervix must be opening, right?? Of course I asked Dr. Google, and found that either labor is ready to begin OR it can be weeks still. It's quite possible it was loosened up at my appointment Tuesday. No way to tell at this point..so we continue to wait...

M and I met with our pediatrician yesterday. We both really like him. He gave us all his background information and we got to ask lots of questions. He seems to have a very gentle, calm demeanor. He comes highly recommended, and our OB sends his kids to him. I think we have a winner, folks! Good to know ahead of time since he'll be performing surgery on our little guy (circumcision) on his second day of life!

Check-Up

37w5d

Today's appointment went well! I am happy to report that I am now 70% effaced and a fingertip dilated...so it looks like there is some movement in the right direction. It's getting harder and harder to wait! My patience is about gone, and my irritability (hormones + no sleep = grumpy Katie) is increasing. Elfie has discovered that he loves to drum on my bladder at night, so I'm definitely spending more time on the toilet than in bed. Oh well. I guess I'd better get used to the lack of sleep...it's only going to get worse!

We go back next Monday for an ultrasound to see how big our guy is getting. If I don't begin labor before then, I am really looking forward to seeing his growth one last time!

Belly Up

I have been lazy about uploading the belly pics, so I apologize for three in one, but I just want to get them up for posterity!

This I just couldn't resist...it's just a few houses down from ours and was taken at 34w1d:


M took this one last night at 37w2d:


My belly has recently become extremely itchy, and I'm not real sure how much more stretching it can take!

37!

37 weeks! Elfie is FULL TERM!!!!

Okay, little man...all those months of pep-talks about staying nice and snug inside mommy are over! I now invite (beg, plead, pray for) you to join us on the outside. I know you like it in there; I would to! I promise, though, that there are so many people who will love you, snuggle you, tickle you, read to you, teach you, and give you a wonderful life out here...it's time now for you to meet them.

Daddy and I are counting the days until we can hold you in our arms and stare at your gorgeous face! Big Sis Lola and Big Bro Charlie can't wait to give you wet kisses all over. You're going to love them!

So..anytime you are ready, we're here with open arms and hearts. Love you, munchkin!

3 years

M and I celebrated our 3-year anniversary today. Shortly after we were married, we hit the challenge of conceiving, and weathered 20 months of heartbreak. We survived stronger than ever, and today are counting the days until our miracle arrives. God is good!

I am the most blessed woman to be married to this wonderful man. He has cared for me in our times of sorrow and joy, and continues to inspire me to be a better wife and friend. I couldn't be happier that this year I can give him the gift of fatherhood. If anyone deserves it most, he's the guy.

Love you Bubba!

Details

36w4d

Had my 36-week check-up this morning. Dr. D checked me and found that I am 60% effaced, but no dilation yet. I am just so glad to hear that we have some progress and my cervix isn't going to hold out like Fort Knox (knock on wood!). Elfie's head is low, but not engaged in the pelvis yet. I'm just hoping he stays head down! BH contractions are also definitely increasing in frequency and intensity. Yay!

My energy level seems to have increased in the past few days...but maybe it's because I have a new determination to get the house clean and be as physically active as I can! I mowed the lawn yesterday, and surprisingly did just fine with it. I thought it would wipe me out, but I felt great the rest of the day! This is such a wonderful feeling...maybe I truly CAN enjoy my pregnancy for these last final weeks!!!

The latest

35w4d

My goodness, where to begin? I feel like I have so much to say, and can't organize my thoughts. I have been an extremely bad blogger lately for a variety of reasons. This pregnancy is literally kicking my butt, and I didn't want this blog to turn into a forum for all my complaints. I'm a little bit over that now, as I feel I should be honest with myself and the world that it isn't all sunshine and roses for everyone!

Back when I was TTCing and undergoing treatments, I never dreamt that I'd someday be here, almost 36 weeks pregnant and actually wishing I wasn't pregnant anymore! It's an awful feeling after everything I've been through to get here, and all the years of longing for a baby inside of me. There are aspects of being pregnant that I love: feeling him move, bonding with him, reading and singing to him, watching him grow, knowing he's thriving, and dreaming of the day I meet him. Obviously, though, there are things about being pregnant that I can live without. I need to remind myself DAILY that this is sooooo temporary, that it WILL end soon, that I need to be more appreciative of this time, that it will become a distant memory...(so many people tell me that there's an amnesia we get after giving birth about all the icky pregnancy stuff that allows us to want to become pregnant again!), AND that the reason I am doing this is because for the rest of my life I will get the privilege of being this little boy's mommy -- a gift that compares with nothing, and a love that isn't matched.

I'm bulleting the last month because there's just too much:

• The painful contractions have subsided, meaning I don't have to rely on the terbutaline to keep me sane. I do, however, continue to have frequent BH contractions.
• Our family and friends threw us an amazing couples' baby shower and we had a blast seeing everyone all together!
  
• M and I have attended 2 out of our three classes: the all-day childbirth class, which was EXCELLENT (I learned so much about the actual labor process and what to expect from our hospital); and the breastfeeding class, which helped calm some of my anxieties. This Thursday we will go to Newborn Care class to finish up the series.
  
• Starting at 32 weeks I developed a pinched nerve right next to my belly button that caused excruciating pain when I stood up or walked around. It lasted until 34.5 weeks, although my doc had said that could very well be painful throughout the rest of my pregnant days. This was awful for me, since the only way I could get relief was to sit or lie down to take the pressure from the weight of Elfie off my belly button. I was banished to the couch and could really only get up to go to the bathroom before it got too painful. SO GLAD that it's gone now...knock on wood! Oh yes, at one point it was so bad that my friend was visiting from out-of-town and she took me to Wal.Mart and pushed me around in a wheelchair just so I could get some shopping done! Talk about humiliating (and hilarious all at the same time!).
  
• My pelvis feels like it's being ripped apart.
• Elfie's room is totally complete, and I promise I'll post some pics soon. It's my happy place :) I even have all his 0-3 month clothes washed and ready.
  
• I'm not getting enough sleep (yes, I know that this is preparation for what's to come!) because my hips ache and Elfie either throws a dance party or has long-lasting hiccups in the middle of the night. Every. Night.
• I am experiencing horrible pain and pressure right on the top of my pelvis from the weight of this kid. It's constant, and makes walking very difficult. It sort of feels like any muscles right there are being torn on a daily basis.
• I can't breathe and become winded and sweaty even just sitting on the couch talking on the phone in my air-conditioned house.
• We have our hospital bag packed. Yowza. I think this might just be real.
  
• I can no longer shave my legs. It's embarrassing how disgusting I'm sure they are, and the same goes for my feet. I need a pedicure just to clip my toenails...which grow at the rate of the weeds in my backyard that I can't bend over to pick.
• Getting dressed is a CHORE, and NOTHING fits anymore, so I do laundry every other day for the 5 items I can still wear. I'll be damned if I'm buying anything new now!
• And while we're on the subject of clothes, none of my bras fit.....what's a girl to do?! Everyone tells me to wait until he's born to buy nursing bras since the girls are going to explode once again...does anyone have insight into this? Opinions?

Okay, so I know that this did end up sounding complain-y. But it feels good to get it all out there! Thanks for enduring it all!

A girl can't catch a break.

31w5d

I've been a busy girl lately....and to quote my doctor, "Wow, you seem to be having an exciting pregnancy!"

Yeah. Not so much. "Exciting" is not exactly the word I would use.

8 p.m. on July 4. I decided to call my doc's office because what I thought had been BH contractions all day were occurring frequently and regularly....as in, I was having 6 in an hour and they seemed to be spaced at regular intervals. I was also noticing some slight cramping with each tightening of my belly. The on-call doc said to drink a jug of water (I was probably dehydrated due to the heat), and if they kept coming to report to L&D. In this time I also took a warm bath, as I had read that it, combined with rest, could sooth and eliminate BH.

They indeed kept coming, so M and I waffled back and forth on whether to go to the hospital. It wasn't until about 12am, as I was lying in bed trying to fall asleep, that I realized that the pain I was experiencing with each contraction was in my back and lower abdomen (it felt like menstrual cramps). What I also noticed is that the pain would come, and then subside. Alarm bells went off at this time because I knew these were NOT BH!!! We packed a bag and promptly headed out.

We were admitted at 1 am and hooked up to the heartbeat and contraction monitors. Sure enough, I was contracting every 4 minutes, and each one was lasting a minute. As we watched the screen, the intervals eventually went down to 2 minutes apart and my pain was increasing with each one. I was starting to get scared! The nurse gave me a shot of terbutaline to stop the contractions and started an IV. She also did the Fetal Fibronectin test to see if my cervical enzymes indicated the possibility of labor in the next two weeks. The test came back negative (yay!), and since my contractions had stopped, they sent me home...at 5 am.

M and I fell into bed and slept until about 11:30 am that day (Monday the 5th). When I woke up, I could tell I was contracting again, but that they weren't too severe. So I got up and had breakfast, did a few chores, and then decided to lie down and watch TV, since I had been instructed to "take it easy." By about 12:30 they were coming regularly again, so I called the doc's office AGAIN (they were closed for the holiday), and a different on-call doc instructed me to head to the hospital to get another shot of terbutaline. As you might imagine, I was less than thrilled about this..but I knew it was the only way to stop my uterus!

So we went to L&D, got the shot, and they also decided to do a cervical check to make sure I wasn't dilated..and I certainly wasn't prepared for the treat that was:

OH.
MY.
GAWD.

This is the first time in my life any has attempted to stick their entire hand up my lady business. I was SHOCKED at how much it hurt. I was literally scooting up the bed away from the nurse because I thought I might die if she tried to get that hand in any further. And the sucky part (well, actually, it turned out to be a good thing) was that she couldn't even reach my cervix! Apparently this is great news because it indicates that it is still high, tight, and closed. But still. I was not amused with the pain of that incident.

We were sent home with a prescription for the oral form of terbutaline. I am to take it as needed for contractions. It's really a miracle drug, except that it makes my heart race and gives me the jitters...as if I've had 10 cups of coffee...but that's small potatoes compared to the cramping the contractions bring on. So far, I had to take a pill last night at 7 because I was contracting every 6 minutes, and then again at 7:30 this morning when they were coming 8 minutes apart.

Coincidentally, my regular doc's appt was this morning, and I was relieved to be able to see him and get the scoop about what's happening and where we go from here. He told me that the FFN test combined with the position of my cervix tells him I am not experiencing preterm labor, only preterm contractions. He said it's most likely due to the size of Elfie compared to his GA (guess it's really not so cute and funny that he's a big boy). He also said that he does expect me to continue to contract throughout the remainder of the pregnancy. In two weeks I will see him again and get the FFN test to check for labor signs. The doc's goal is 34 weeks, and he said 36 weeks "would be gravy". So I guess I am to expect that Elfie could very likely be arriving quite a bit ahead of schedule...

So. Yeah. Not too "exciting;" rather, "nerve-wracking, anxiety-inducing, stressful, and scary" are the words I'd used to describe this.

I had hoped that with all the hell we experienced getting pregnant that I could at least have an uneventful pregnancy. This is just further proof that I am not the one driving the ship here, and that God laughs at the plans I make. But as I ponder the events of the last 10 weeks, I am reminded that nothing really truly worth having in life comes easily. This whole experience has been hard, and I know that motherhood, too, will be difficult.

And I welcome it with open arms. I wouldn't trade this "suffering" for the world. Because in a few short weeks I'll meet my son, and that's what really matters.

30? How did that happen??

30 weeks!

This morning I got the best 30-week present EVER! The perinatologist reported that little Elfie is cured of his arrhythmia!! I am over the moon that my guy is healthy and that this "hiccup" has resolved itself (at least for now!!!).

To make my life even more fantastic, the doctor gave me some INCREDIBLE 3D pictures of our handsome little boy! This was such an unexpected, added bonus that I bawled like a baby right then and there as I saw my son's face for the first time. I got to watch him opening and closing his mouth and covering his face with this hands. Unbelievable! He looks just like his daddy!!!!!

How is it that this pregnancy is three-quarters complete? Where has the time gone? I cannot believe that in a few short months I will be what I've dreamt about my entire life: a mommy. It's simply unreal.

Here's his profile:



And a straight-on face shot with his mouth open:



And one of the 3-D shots (he has his hand over one of his eyes):

Uh-Mazing!

Costa Rica was amazing! We had such a fun, relaxing vacation with M's family. If you haven't been, it is the most lush, green, tropical country and the people there are so friendly! I had a chance to brush up on my very limited Spanish, and loved listening to the natives "Ticos" speak. Overall (minus the mosquitoes and humidity), a fabulous trip!!! We feel so fortunate to have been able to go.

Traveling in my seventh month proved to be more difficult than I anticipated, but M was such a champ in helping me out. He was so attentive and caring to my needs and limitations, which made the trip infinitely easier. Third tri exhaustion has definitely set in, and I am now taking daily naps (siestas!) to cope with the fatigue.

I have a peri appointment on Thursday to see if Elfie's arrhythmia has gotten any better. Keeping fingers crossed that it has!

Here are some pic from the trip...

Some Relief

The appointment this morning went well. This doctor is, by far, the best I have ever been to in terms of his bedside manner and attention to detail. I know he works primarily with high-risk pregnancies, so it's his job to be uber-sensitive to hormonal pregnant women..it is my impression that he is certainly in the right profession!

We started out with a full anatomy scan of Elfie. Boy, is he growing! He is now measuring 13 days ahead of schedule, and is an astonishing 3 pounds. I was shocked! We got some great pics that I'll scan and post later.

The doctor was a bit concerned that he is so big. I hadn't been worried (until today!) because M is a big guy and was 11 pounds at birth. We just always expected to have a big baby. So my instructions are to reduce my carb intake...uggh! That's a hard assignment, since that what I crave the most besides fruit! Oh well, small price to pay for Elfie's health.

And then on to the goods:

After an extremely detailed look at the heart, the doctor determined there aren't any structural abnormalities. We did see and hear the irregular beats, and he explained to us that it is not uncommon for them to resolve themselves. I was instructed to eliminate ALL sources of caffeine from my diet, including chocolate and (get this!) my cocoa butter stretch mark cream! Apparently, unbeknownst to me, I've been feeding my baby caffeine through my belly every morning! So there goes that.

Oh yes, and one more set of instructions: "Have a great time in Costa Rica!"

I left feeling much better, but of course it's going to be in the back of my mind until it's gone or we know more. I have a follow-up appointment in two weeks. If the arrhythmia is still there I will be monitored weekly with this perinatologists until I deliver. He also did mention that there is an increased chance that, if the arrhythmia persists, I'll be recommended for c-section, as they prefer to not put the baby in a stressful labor situation under these circumstances.


For now, I'm just taking my kick counts, relaxing as much as possible, and PACKING! We leave early Saturday morning and return the following Sunday, do I probably won't be blogging until at least then. I hope you all continue to enjoy June!

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.

Good news first:

I did, indeed, pass my glucose test, although the number (115) was not as low as I thought it would be judging by my "almost passing out" experience!

Bad news second:

M and I are involved in a worker's comp nightmare (really just filling out the paperwork, knowing whom to send it to, waiting for calls to be returned, etc, etc.). This is regarding the $2600 hospital stay I had as a result of the soccerball to the uterus at school. Uggh. I hate this.

And now, the Ugly:

My appointment with Dr. D this morning revealed the Elfie has a cardiac arrhythmia. As soon as he put that doppler on my belly I knew that the beats were not right. His little heart would beat 3 or 4 times and then skip one or two; wash, rinse, repeat. Dr. D is sending me to the perinatologist on Thursday morning to have him check the chambers and valves of my little guy's heart. I am freaking out, but know that there is nothing I can do to make it better right now except wait and pray. I am reassured with the fact that Elfie is extremely active (which the Dr. said is an excellent thing), but just can't help but be apprehensive.

Obviously, if we find an abnormality, our trip to Costa Rica is out of the question. My own heart feels so fragile right now...I'm asking for lost of prayers and support if you can lend it.

Classes, Cankles, and Costa Rica!

27 weeks.

Hey people!

I can't believe how long it's been since I posted. I am really busy lately, and can't seem to find the energy to sit down and spill everything...although I feel as though so much is happening that I want to share!

So, to start, I haven't heard back about my glucose test, which leads me to believe that I passed. I have an appt. with Dr. D on Monday so I'll double check with him because I'm curious about the number!

I recently took a fabulous trip to Southern Cal with my M, my mom, and my stepdad. It was so nice to relax in the sun and talk about our plans when the little man arrives. Mom and I went shopping, and Elfie ended up with more clothes than I did! I bought a cute bikini though, and am pleasantly surprised at how comfortable I am sporting the bare belly bump. My friend E and I saw SATC 2 (because we are big fans and saw the first one together)...and it was okay. I laughed, but didn't think is was as good as the first movie...and certainly not as good as the series.

I am definitely starting to feel more fatigued lately, and it comes in the form of really sore feet at the end of the day, and a sore back after standing/walking too long. I am also the lucky recipient of EDEMA....a.k.a. CANKLES. It's pretty shocking and disgusting, really. I look down at my feet and can't even see my ankle bones. I'm noticing quite a bit of water retention in my legs as well. Walking has gotten better since I've slowed my pace, so I'm at least still getting some exercise.

Elfie's movements are changing also. Well, it's probably not his movements so much as how I they feel to me. With his increasing size I can actually follow body parts (most likely feet or knees) as they move across my belly. CRAZY COOL. Sometimes he'll get me on the side of my tummy and it tickles like crazy. I love it!

I changed my background in preparation of our LAST HURRAH! In 9 days we are leaving for Costa Rica!!! I will be 28.5 weeks when we leave and 29.5 when we return. Needless to say, this will be it for us in terms of traveling before the birth. We will be doing it up big! M's whole family will be there to celebrate his parents' 45th wedding anniversary. He has three brothers who each have 2 kids, so it'll be a full house but tons of fun. I, of course, will be living in the pool (and the kitchen!).

When we return we have our baby shower to look forward to. After that we have an all-day childbirth class in addition to two evening classes (one is a breastfeeding class and the other is infant basics). Then we're in the home stretch! It's so hard to believe how incredibly fast this pregnancy is flying by, and how soon we will be meeting our son.

I'm leaving you with some pics of my time away with the fam..

Glucose

I had my glucose screening this morning. That meant I had to to fast (i.e. not eat or drink anything this morning before the appt). So of course I showed up at 6:45 am STARVING. Luckily, I was able to get the sugary drink quickly (did I mention I was really, really hungry??). I drank that sucker down and felt so much better with some "sugar energy." Unfortunately, my sugar high lasted only about 40 minutes. At 7:45 I started getting very light-headed..similar to this experience, and thought I'd either pass out or throw up. I went to the back of the lab to lie down, which made me feel better for the remaining 20 minutes. I was so determined to not throw up because I knew that would void the test! They were able to get the blood, and the nice lab tech sent me home with a few crackers so I didn't crash my car. Phew! Another bullet dodged.

Looking back at that experience, it doesn't surprise me much. I have always had issues with low blood sugar levels (M calls it the "Low Blood Sugar Monster"), and benefit from smaller, more frequent meals to keep my blood levels even. Even pre-pregnancy I needed to eat breakfast AS SOON AS I got up in the morning. The lab people told me it's not that uncommon for preggers to experience it. Has anyone else had this happen to them??

I will be surprised and dismayed if I flunk that test! I don't think I'd survive the 3-hour torture!

Hospital Stay

24w3d

Well.

We've had an eventful few days.

On Friday at school I took the class out for PE. They picked soccer that day, and really didn't think too much of it. About 10 minutes into the game, as I had turned my head to yell at the girls who thought PE was social time, I took a soccer ball to the uterus. Hard, fast, and painful.

Freaking out commenced.

I called my doctor and he told me to come to Labor and Delivery to be checked out. I was scared to begin with, but once I heard this, I was REALLY concerned. Most especially because I wasn't feeling Elfie move. My MIL met me halfway to the hospital and drove the rest of the way...I was so glad to have her with me!

We got there and checked in, and they set me up in a room, had me put a gown on, and strapped a heartbeat monitor and contraction monitor around my belly. It was such a relief to hear my little guy's strong little heart pounding away, I started crying!! My doctor (whom I saw briefly as he was between deliveries) told me they were going to monitor be and baby for a few hours. Soon after, they took me down to get an ultrasound. Apparently, the u/s tech was looking for any placental abruption or tears that could cause baby to lose blood. M showed up in time to see the ultrasound.

The ultrasound looked really good, with no abnormalities. Elfie was moving around a lot, and he was SO BIG! I couldn't believe how much he'd grown in 5 weeks! It was such an emotional sight for me, I was just mesmerized by my son's body and movement.

M and I thought that since things seemed to look good that we'd be heading home. I was STARVING, and wanted to get the heck out of there. My doctor came in and informed us that we just had one more thing to do before they could release us. They were going to take blood to check for any fetal cells in my blood. M and I were pretty confident everything would be okay, but this meant more waiting around...

..and then we got the results of the bloodwork. They found Elfie's cells in my blood. This, as it was explained to us, was most likely a result of the abdominal trauma, since it's not a common thing to see at this gestational age. They told us they were going to keep me overnight for monitoring, and that I would see a perinatologist in the morning for a detailed u/s of Elfie's brain and blood flow.

This is where I lost it.

First, imagine a hungry, tired, hormonal pregnant woman. Then, add on top of that the possibility that there's something wrong with the baby it took her almost two years and $10,000 to conceive. Next, take her husband away from her for a night. The result is almost always going to be less that beautiful. Downright ugly, in fact. I was SO NOT happy at this point.

I think pretty much the only thing that kept me sane was hearing and seeing Elfie's hb staying strong, not to mention the hard swift kicks he was giving me. It was a long, long night...(remember, I was in the LABOR and DELIVERY ward?)...as I was kept awake by nurses talking loudly outside my room and ladies LABORING (screaming, crying, grunting), and the resulting wail of newborns taking their first breaths. Under any other circumstances, I'm sure I would have been so excited to see and hear such thing staking place. However, I felt that it was way too close to home. I was NOT supposed to be there! I wanted to get myself and Elfie back home so he could bake another 3 months!!!!

Unfortunately, I slept a total of about 4 hours that night. I thought the perinatologist would be showing up in the morning and then we'd be outta there! Anyone who has ever stayed in a hospital knows that this is not how things work. EVERYTHING is longer and slower than you'd like. They definitely weren't operating on "Katie time." The doctor didn't show up until 1:30 p.m. Talk about a long, excruciating wait.

SO...the ultrasound with the new doc was simply fascinating. He was there, basically, to measure Elfie's bloodflow to determine if he was anemic (had a low blood count), which would indicate that he was losing blood. He did this by targeting very specific arteries and measuring the volume and directionality of blood. He spent a long time looking at each chamber of the heart and then he isolated an artery in Elfie's brain. M and I were just speechless watching him take his measurements.

After all was said and done, the perinatologist determined that everything looked good with Elfie. He wasn't able to detect any abnormalities in the placenta, no hematomas, or anything else that would concern him. We were so relieved, and I WAS SO READY TO GET HOME! He sent us home with orders to monitor Elfie's movement. He told us that if we pay close attention in the morning and at night that we should be able to get at least 5 kicks in an hour. Apparently, he doesn't know out little boy because I get 10 kicks in a 10 minute period! But of course, I will be more mindful of counting his movements.

So..I guess for now we have avoided disaster. I have a soccerball-sized bruise smack dab in the middle of my belly, but that's small potatoes knowing that it could have been so much worse. I am an extremely grateful lady right now, and will definitely be staying OFF of the soccer field!

Cheer up, Charlie!

23 weeks!

Just checking in to report that Elfie and I are just plugging along, growing bigger every day and experiencing some of the not-so-joys of pregnancy! Lately, I have had quite a bit of pain and pressure in my lower abdomen, mainly triggered by walking long distances. Unfortunately, the longest distance my body seems to be okay with is to the park down the street from our house. In my book, this is just not nearly enough exercise. Oh yes, and the back pain and heartburn? They're still hanging around too! I don't worry about it too much since most of my pain is relieved the minute I sit down and relax, but will definitely be bringing it up to Dr. D at my appointment on Monday. I'm guessing it is just par for the course, and most likely ligament stretching...Has anyone else experienced this or something similar?

The nursery is coming along steadily. We are going to start our furniture shopping soon, and then it will really start to come together (!). Charlie (our canine "baby") has been moping around the house since I've become increasingly less mobile...but last Friday I found one way to cheer him up:

He loves to feel Elfie kicking away at my belly button! This is in the nursery..as you can see, I decided to get crafty with some canvasses, paint, and stencils. Funny that I have those done, but still need the majority of my furniture!!!

He's a kicker!

I've been a slacker blogger this week...my apologies! I just returned from a fabulous trip out of state to visit my Mom and Stepdad to see their new home. It was so much fun to relax and catch up with them. Mom and I did a little bit of baby planning and dreaming (and shopping!), and she was officially the first one to feel Elfie kicking from the outside.

My boy has gotten so much stronger in the past two weeks, and is now consistently kicking (or punching?) my belly button. The sensation of feeling my baby move inside of me is incredibly unreal. It's quite possibly the most moving, exciting experience in my life so far. I crave the movement, and when it happens I am fascinated and in awe. Today, sitting on the couch, it was so strong I could actually see my belly moving.

M and I painted Elfie's room last weekend, and I have plans to get the furniture soon. We inherited a white Jen.ny L.ind crib from M's SIL, which has been sitting disassembled in the room for two years! I put the bedding on to see how it looks, and I'm even more in love with it now than when I picked it out. So we are going with white furniture...and I'd like to make a trip to I.KEA to see some of our options. My friend is selling us her glider for $40...I lucked out on that one!

We registered at BRU on Sunday, it feels great to have checked that off the list. The actual experience of registering was overwhelming. Especially when you start in the breastfeeding and/or baby safety section. There are SO MANY different products to choose from! I think we did a good job of starting with the basics, and now we're having fun getting online and adding/deleting items as I do more research. I also started reading a few parenting books to get me prepared to be a mommy!

This morning I had an appointment with a cardiologist. Dr. D (my OB) referred me to him because I told him that I've had a few episodes of my heart racing and I also have heart palpitations quite frequently. He told me that it's completely normal for such things to happen in pregnancy since circulation changes so much, but I think after seeing that there's heart disease in my family, he wanted to take all necessary precautions. The appointment this morning went well. He did and EKG and took a pretty thorough history, only to tell me that he thinks I'm fine. I wasn't too worried, just glad to be more safe than sorry!

Halfway There!

Boy, oh boy!

I mean that in every sense of the phrase! Since Monday's appointment I have been busy picking out bedding (it is SOOOO cute!!), creating my color scheme, and researching registry items. It is SO OVERWHELMING! Thankfully (and I never thought I'd find myself actually feeling gratitude for this..), I have a few friends who recently had babies, and they are turning out to be excellent sources of wisdom and advice on the subject of must-have baby items. Tomorrow I will go to the pick up the paint for Elfie's room, and hopefully can get the room taped and tarped...... Ohmygosh I can't believe this is really happening!...... I've waited a long, long time to decorate that empty room. I'll post pics as soon as I take 'em!

On the "how I'm feeling" front, the heartburn is a constant!!! Thank the Lord for Tums and their soothing qualities, although I'm having to load up on fiber to counteract the, ahem, "effects" of a lot of calcium! Luckily it hasn't been too bad yet.

I am in constant awe of my changing body. When I pass a mirror, I can't help but strike a pose to see my bump from different angles! As I feel Elfie moving around more and more everyday, I can relax some of the anxieties that something might go wrong. Of course, I know that nobody is completely safe from complications and tragedy, but for now I choose to enjoy and delight in this amazing miracle. I get teary-eyed just thinking about holding my newborn son!

So...I am officially at the halfway mark. It's the blink of an eye when I consider what it took to get here, and I thoroughly look forward to the next 4.5 months and beyond!

It's a.....

BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Our appointment went better than I could have ever dreamt! Not only did our little Elfie reveal the goods, but they were THE FIRST THING WE SAW when Dr. D turned on the monitor! M and I both had guessed that it was a boy (I had two very vivid dreams about boys and their "parts!"), so we were excited to both be correct! (heeheehee...I LOVE being right!!!).

I have gained 6 lbs. in the past 5 weeks, which is a little over a pound a week. Doc was pleased about that (as was I, though shocked that it wasn't more!). This puts my weight gain at 9 lbs since my 10 week appointment, which is when I started keeping track. Overall, not too shabby. Baby's weight is estimated to be about 3/4 of a pound. Way to pack it on, little man!

Elfie looked absolutely fantastic on the screen. He was moving around a lot and practicing his dance moves for us. We got a big kick out of seeing his wiggles and watching the doc measure everything. Our quad screen came back normal, so it was explained to us that our chances for genetic abnormality have now decreased to about 1.5%. I was completely emotional seeing my SON wave and move, especially knowing that he is healthy and growing appropriately. Overall, a very moving experience. Quite a momentous event.

After the appointment M and I stopped at Babies R Us and parked in the Expectant Mother's spot. Wow. What a feeling. For the first time in my life, I didn't feel like an impostor walking into that store! We picked out two adorable outfits for our little man..our first gifts to baby boy. I can't wait to see them on him!!! Here are some pics from our day....